I Surrender

"God, I give this to You."

I can't count the number of times that that phrase has passed through my mind. I understood the value that surrender had, in the Christian life. And I thought I knew what it looked like to lay everything at the foot of the cross.

Recently, God turned my view of this topic on its head. It came through Galatians 2:20:

"I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me."

I'd never thought about how directly the idea of surrender was tied to the concept of dying spiritually. Surrender seemed so simple; trust God to do what's best, and go on living life as if nothing has changed. Bringing death into the conversation is a little extreme, isn't it?

I have been crucified with Christ. I have laid it all at the foot of the cross. I have given up my life, in exchange for His. The old is gone; the new has come. My life is not my own; I have been bought with a price. I have surrendered.

Dying doesn't just mean laying your life down, only to go on living. The concept of death reflects the fact that, when you lay your life down, you don't get to pick it back up again. When you die, you don't get to keep your life. When you have been crucified, you can't just keep living as though nothing has changed.

And, when you have surrendered to Him, you don't get to take control again. Not if it's real surrender. Not if you've truly given everything to Him.

I wondered if that was why the thought terrified me so much, as I lay on the floor that night, wrestling with God. This wasn't just giving Him control of a moment, or a day. It wasn't even the sometimes vague concept of "giving Him control of my life". This was specific. It was my dream; it was THE dream, that I couldn't help but think about each day. I wanted it so much. The strange part, though, was that I was sure I had already given God control of it. I had prayed so many prayers, "surrendering" it into His hands. But that night, He took me deeper. In the past, I had given my dream to God, so that He could fulfill it for me, in the right way. That night, He laid a challenging question on my heart: What if I don't fulfill it?  It wasn't a completely new idea, but it hit me so hard. Surrender became so much more than just telling God He had control. It meant laying down my thoughts, and the way I believed I had a "right" to this dream. It required giving it up, in the full expectation that God would take it away.

Sometimes, surrender feels freeing. But, if I'm completely honest, that's not what I felt that night. I felt pain, as though someone had taken a knife to my soul. Yet, in the midst of it, there was something greater. I felt rest. His presence was with me, holding me. It didn't stop the pain... somehow, it didn't need to. The peace that came in knowing He would do what was best for me stood above any feelings.

I crucified my control that night. And the very next morning, it was back. I wanted that dream. My flesh wasn't going to let go that easily. I had to take it before God again, in surrender. The next day, it came again. And the next. All week, that which I laid down kept trying to come back, to take control.

I. Die. Daily.

Crucifying your flesh is not a one-time process. It's going to keep coming back. Surrender is a daily, moment-by-moment process. And, most times, it hurts to give God control. We think we know what's in our best interests, and it is so tempting to fight that alone. But we only see this side of the battlefield; God sees the whole thing. He knows you, better than you know yourself. He has plans for you, and they are for good. As Pastor Eric Ludy put it, if we could only see one one-millionth of God's heart, we would beg him to come in and take control of our lives, holding nothing back.

I would encourage you to take some time this week, and take a deep look at your life. In what areas are you holding back from Him?  What would it look like to surrender it, completely?  And, more importantly, are you willing to surrender?

Because, when you do, you don't have control any more. But there is no safer place for your heart, than in the arms of the Lover.

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Worship Song: 

"Take My Heart",
by Misty Edwards

No Condemnation

"There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ."

That truth was so clear, I couldn't understand how a Christian could wrestle with condemnation. I never thought I would struggle with the idea. The Enemy could attack me with whatever he wanted, but condemnation, I told myself, wouldn't work.

It's strange how much I underestimated the power of condemnation. Over the past year, I have seen it face to face, and I have crumbled before it. I have found myself awake for hours some nights, kicking myself over something I had done that day, and unable to receive God's forgiveness.

We're all familiar with the first sin. Man chose to put himself in the place of God, by choosing his own way first. In doing so, Adam and Eve ate from the forbidden tree of the knowledge of good and evil. From that moment, the plan of redemption had begun. It started with the Old Covenant, marked by laws and sacrifices. The entire message of the Old Covenant was centered around the knowledge of good and evil. The law laid out right from wrong, and the way the people should lead their lives. The purpose of the law, as stated in the New Testament, was to show the people how far they fell from being able to keep God's commands. It painted a picture of good and evil, but could never be kept by a sinful human.

But it didn't end there. The New Covenant was not marked by knowledge, but by life. The people of Israel had lived under the law for centuries; they had the knowledge. That wasn't the message of the gospel. Jesus didn't come to earth to tell people how they should live their lives. He certainly addressed this topic, and His words contain incredible truths about what the Christian life should look like. As Pastor Andy Stanley said, however, Jesus' message wasn't His teachings; His message was Himself. His message was life, and He spilled that message forth by giving His own life on a tree. He created a New Covenant with man. He freed us from sin, and we are no longer ruled by the knowledge of good and evil, and the condemnation of knowing we can't make it on our own, but by a message of life.

How does this affect our lives, on this side of the cross?  The first relates to our own fight with condemnation, on a personal level. The Enemy's lies of condemnation are rooted outside of the cross. He uses the knowledge of good and evil, and holds our failures over our heads. And part of that attack is rooted in truth; we have done wrong, and we deserve punishment. But, through the New Covenant, that punishment has been taken. Yes, we are sinners. We have no plea in and of ourselves before the throne of God. Through the cross, however, we are no longer slaves to sin but sons of righteousness, in Christ. We are no longer under the control of sin, but the covenant of life. In Christ, there is no condemnation. We have fallen short... but we have been redeemed.

The message of the tree of life goes even deeper than that. Not only does it affect our personal lives, but it affects the way we view the world around us. Currently, there are countless political issues flying around, that the Bible directly addresses. Take homosexual marriage, or Planned Parenthood. How do you view those people?  I'm not asking what your position is on those issues. How do you view the people involved?

Christians are becoming increasingly outspoken about these issues, and I love the fact that the church is coming out of hiding and speaking truth. But Christians also have a reputation of being some of the most condemning people in the nation. Christians... who are supposed to be living in the shadow of the cross; who call themselves followers of Jesus, who was the most loving person to ever walk the face of the earth.

The problem, as Christian leader Anny Donewald stated, is that Christians are speaking out of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. We believe in the New Covenant, but, when it comes to these issues, we are so often living in the Old. Instead of love, we bring a message of condemnation.

What is the first thing that comes to mind, when you hear about or see a homosexual person?  What thoughts do you have towards a mother who has had an abortion?  Yes, they have done wrong. We are not called to embrace their lifestyles, or stand by and watch as they destroy themselves and others. God hates sin... but He loves the sinners. Jesus portrayed this so clearly, as he ate with cheating tax collectors, reached out to Samaritan prostitutes, and washed the feet of His betrayer. He didn't accept their lifestyle; He called them to something higher. But He did it, not through condemnation, but through love.

What do you see, when you look at those people?  If you only see their actions, and their wrong, I would challenge you to ask yourself if you are truly looking at these people through God's eyes. Do you only see the sin, when you look at the sinner?  We have all sinned against God and, at the core, our sins are just as bad as theirs. But when God looks at us, He doesn't see our sin. He sees the life of Jesus, poured out in us. He looks at us through the eyes of love.

Anny Donewald experienced the message of condemnation firsthand, in her early adult years. Although she travels across the nation sharing the message of hope, she wasn't always living a clean, tidy Christian life. She spent years of her life in the sex industry, working in night clubs all across the country. Hearing about her story is incredible. She wasn't being trafficked; she could have left at any time, and she tried to, but she felt herself trapped. It was as though she had nowhere else to turn. And the Christians in her life, instead of showing her love, brought only condemnation, telling her how damaging her lifestyle was. Anny wasn't freed through the knowledge of good and evil; she was freed through the life and love of Jesus Christ and, today, goes back into those same night clubs to minister to girls in the industry with the light of the gospel. One thing she said, in an online interview, really stood out to me: "You can't tell these girls they're going to hell. They already know that; they're in it right now." 

There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ. We are not condemned, nor are we called to condemn others. Are we brave enough to look past the sin, and love the sinners?  Are we willing to live our lives in the shadow of the tree of life?

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Worship Song: 

"No Longer Slaves",
by Bethel

Before His Eyes

She carefully bends every way in the mirror to make sure her chest isn’t showing at any angle. Going through her closet she finally finds one skirt that is long enough. Scrutinizing herself in the mirror she asks herself “Will this make him stumble?” 

She twirls in her new dress with a giddy clap of her hands, but stops half way through. She doesn’t want to mess up her makeup. Putting on her best earrings she asks herself “Will he notice me now?”

I’ve heard a lot about modesty. And from a young age I’ve found it confusing. Where is the line between modest and not modest actually drawn? There was a time in my life where I drew the line closer to myself. I wouldn’t wear a skirt above knee length and rejected almost every shirt I saw in the store as “not modest enough”. I drove my poor mother crazy when we went shopping because, in my mind, every outfit I saw could be a potential stumbling block. 

Later I started drawing the line a little further out, but focused my modesty efforts at my actions and behavior. I was deathly afraid that something I said or did might come off as flirting or cause a boy to think the wrong things so I basically stopped talking to boys altogether. It was easier than trying to monitor every word from my mouth, every glance, every smile. 

My earlier confusion about modesty led me to read a lot of articles on modesty - some that shame girls for wearing “skimpy” outfits and others that shame boys for looking. Many articles make the case that men need to be kept responsible for their actions and that women should be allowed to wear whatever they want. Other articles state the same old argument that men are are visual and women need to help protect their purity. And it’s interesting to me that both sides of the argument have completely missed the point of modesty. We have made modesty a debate on what people think of our dress when modesty should have nothing to do with what people think. 

One girl is terrified to wear a skirt above knee length and another girl wears bikini’s with pride. One girl experiments with makeup, while the other won’t braid her hair. One girl flirts shamelessly while the other is afraid to look a boy in the eye. Which girl is wrong? Both. The point of modesty isn’t, and never has been, to control what men think of you. The point has always been an attitude of the heart, and a concern with how God, not man, sees you. As long as we are looking to please others - either by our provocative or conservative dress - we are looking in the wrong place. When it comes to modesty our first thought should be, is my Heavenly Father pleased with the way I am acting? It should never be, will this make a boy look my way? 

For some, honoring God will look different than it does for others. For one girl it may mean wearing jeans to church so her friend doesn’t feel awkward surrounded by dresses. For another it may be obeying her parents by not wearing the shirt they find too low cut. But no matter what it looks like, modesty should stem from a desire for God to be pleased with how you behave, not for man.

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