Shields of a Thousand Warriors

"Your neck is like the tower of David,
    built with courses of stone;
on it hang a thousand shields,
    all of them shields of warriors."

                          -Song of Solomon 4:4
When I first heard this verse last year, it inspired me. I thought I was invincible. I believed that I could stand against anything that came against me, and that nothing could touch me that hadn't first passed through the hands of Christ. I loved the thought of being protected, and being untouchable, when it came to the attacks of the Enemy.

Now, I feel anything but invincible. I've seen the attacks, and I've seen the way I give into them again, and again, and again. I wonder where the shields are, that were meant to defend me. I wonder why I still don't know how to wield them in my life.

We can all try to be invincible. For awhile, we might rest in Him, and fight the attacks in His unfailing strength. But slowly, we become subtly convinced that that strength is somehow our own, and that we can stand in our abilities. We would never admit to it. Growing up in Christian homes and going to church every week, it's easy to convince ourselves that we're living the Christian life as it was meant to be lived. That our lives don't belong to ourselves; that the only thing we live for is Jesus Himself.

But I would challenge you to look deeper into your life. What words or images consume your thought life?  What activities take up the bulk of your time?  What is the first thing you turn to, when you need help or comfort?  How do you spend your free time?  What things give you the most peace, or relief, from the chaos that life can so easily become?

And we wonder why we can't fight off the attacks.

So often, we feel helpless in the face of attacks, whether it's depression, insecurity, anxiety, or whatever else it might be. I heard a video sermon recently by Paul Washer, and one line really stood out to me. He said that, when it comes to fighting off attacks, "Your problem isn't that you're too weak; it's that you're too strong."

In our own strength, we are too weak to fight off that which would come against us. But in our own pride and self-sufficiency, we are too strong to admit that we can't do it on our own.

The place of victory is not in what we can bring to the table. It's not the ability to keep our heads up, or convince ourselves that we're good enough. The place of victory is the cross of Jesus Christ, where He would willingly pour out His everything, physically and spiritually, to rescue those so broken that they could not even acknowledge their need for Him. The Enemy had the upper hand, and humanity gave it to him. But He gave up His life not only to forgive us, but to free us. To give us His own strength to fight, with the promise that, no matter what the circumstances, He would go before us to give us the victory.

The secret to victory is as simple as it is beautiful, given by Jesus Himself in John 15:
"Remain in my love."

The One who has defeated death stands with you now, and longs to reveal Himself to you. In Him, we have the shields of a thousand warriors.

~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~ 

Worship Song: 

"Strong Tower",
by Kutless

Lily Among Thorns

She

"I am a rose of Sharon,
    a lily of the valleys.

He

2 Like a lily among thorns
    is my darling among the young women."

-Song of Songs 2:1-2

Almost two years ago, God awakened me to the vision of a lifestyle completely set apart for Him. The thought of that selfless existence drew me in, and I tried to chase it. I was inspired by the stories of women from the past, and in the present, who had walked the narrow path and emerged victorious. Elisabeth Elliot, who went back to Ecuador to serve and love the people who had killed her husband. Gladys Aylward, who followed no matter the danger, and brought light to the darkest places. Amy Carmichael, who rescued children and poured out her life to see God's justice come to earth. These women were truly lilies of the valley; their stories and trust in Him were beautiful beyond imagination.

I wanted to follow. I had caught the vision. But I wasn't anticipating the thorns. I knew they were coming; I was expecting the difficulties to come from the world, and the pressure to give in to a mediocre lifestyle. I wasn't expecting what happened.

The thorns came. They're here. But they weren't from outside. The thorns I face, that try to choke the life out of my spiritual journey, come from within. My flesh, telling me sleep is more important than late nights of wrestling prayer. My pride, whispering that a servant's heart is unnecessary. My selfishness, convincing me that love is something that has to be deserved.

And we've all given into the thorns, on some level. The subtle lies of the Enemy, that tell us that we are our own chief concern, and everything else is secondary, seem so right, and we are easily led astray. Looking back is painful. The way I failed to fight. The way I failed to serve. The way I failed to love. Left with only the ashes of what was once a burning passion to follow Him, no matter what.

Alone, we are ashes, crushed under the thorns.

But we aren't called to fight on our own. It doesn't matter how many times it's been repeated; the truth remains that God is with you, and fights for you. His banner over you is love; there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ. You are not defined by your yesterday. I've heard that phrase so many times, and I used to repeat it, to remind myself that I wasn't the person I was three years ago. I forget how literal it can and should be; I'm not defined by last year's mistakes, but I'm not even defined by Saturday May 16th's mistakes. I'm not defined by the person I was, or even the person I am. My identity is not in who I am, but in whose I am. In ourselves, we are nothing, but in Him, there is freedom and life and the strength to love and be loved.

Through Him, I am more than what these ashes say. They are fleeting, but He is eternal. In Christ, we are a new creation, freed from yesterday, freed from the power of our thorns over us.

I love the words of Isaiah 43:

"When you pass through the waters,

    I will be with you;

and when you pass through the rivers,

    they will not sweep over you.

When you walk through the fire,

    you will not be burned;

    the flames will not set you ablaze."

-Isaiah 43:2

This is an incredible promise; through Him, we are untouched by the attacks that would come against us. But He never promised that the attacks wouldn't come. Although they will not sweep over you, the rivers will still rise around you; although the flames will not burn you, they will still emerge in your midst. His promise was not an easy life; His promise was of victory.

The thorns will still be there. On this side of the cross, sin still exists. But through Jesus, it has no power over us.

But in Him, we are a lily among thorns, not under them.

~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~ 

Worship Song: 

"More Than Ashes"
by Tim Reinherr

The Rose

"I am a rose of sharon."
                -Song of Solomon 2:1a

Roses are beautiful; they're one of the most common symbols of affection in our culture, and it's not difficult to see why. This image, given early on in one of the Bible's most famous love letters, is an incredible picture of God's love for His church.

Roses have a unique shape. While the petals of some flowers open fully to expose their centers, rose petals create a form around the center. You can't actually see the top of the stem, without removing the petals. It's as though they have a hidden person inside. Something the outside world can't touch. Something beautiful within, that only their Maker knows. The concept is reflected in Revelation 19:

"11 I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called Faithful and True. With justice he judges and wages war. 12 His eyes are like blazing fire, and on his head are many crowns. 

He has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself."

-Revelation 19:11-12

Eric Ludy, in his book Wrestling Prayer, points out the incredible intimacy that this reflects. He writes:

"His Father has given Him a name that is so intimate, so beautiful, so precious that we as men are not yet able to know it. 

We know that His name is the Word of God. We know that He is called Faithful and True. And even later in this scriptural sequence, we also know that on His thigh is inscribed the name 

King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

However, there is a name that we don't yet know...

It is the name given Him in the secret place of fellowship with His Father." 

The love and communion between the Father and the Son is beyond what we can wrap our minds around. But the most unbelievable part, is what Jesus Himself says in a letter to the churches:

"17 Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To the one who is victorious, I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give that person a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to the one who receives it."

-Revelation 2:17

He desires that same sacred intimacy with us. He longs for us to come away, and give the inner person of our hearts to Him.

But it's not because He needs it. Another feature of roses is their fleeting lifespan. They flourish for a few days, or maybe even a week, but then they die. We, as people, can survive without them. We are complete without them. How much more is God's ability to survive without us?  We have only a fleeting breath; we were formed from dust, and to dust we will return. In return for His love, we have rebelled and sinned against Him. He was complete without us, and had every right to reject us when we fell.... but He never did.

He took that brokenness, and created something precious. He took that dust, and made it something beautiful.

Roses are also dependent. Their buds can't form on their own. They have to grow on stems, in bushes, and on vines. When cut off, they can only live for so long. But when they are on the vine, they can flourish. They can become truly beautiful. They can grow into the creation they were designed to be. I love the way Jesus uses this imagery in John 15:

5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. 7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

9 “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love.10 If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love."

-John 15:5-9

Throughout the Bible, God is portrayed more than once as a gardener. He tends to His roses, and does not abandon them to the storms of life. He walks with them, cares for them, and loves them.
He will not forsake us.

~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~ 

Worship Song: 

"Beloved"
by Tenth Avenue North

Victory of the Heart

Regionals was an interesting tournament. From upsets in the debate break announcements to the four flights of stairs to get to the hangout and competition rooms, it certainly presented its challenges. But in those challenges there was such incredible joy. This week, you reminded me what victory truly was.

Everyone at that tournament was fighting for a slot to nationals. And not everyone at that tournament met that goal. It hurt so many of us. Amidst the exhaustion, laughter, and endless hallways of the past week, sometimes I had to wonder what we were really there for.

The real champions this week, were the ones who lived beyond. I was so blessed to call them my brothers and sisters in Christ. Some were successful. Some were hurting. Some were disappointed. But each and every one of them was rooted in why they were at that tournament. They reminded me what it meant to be victorious.

Victory was the competitor of integrity, who took a stance and prayed with those who had made it to finals, when he found out they had taken his spot in the round. Victory was the warrior of the heart, who would pour herself out encouraging others, even when she knew they would be going to nationals in her place. Victory was the speaker of conviction, who moved past the ballots and made a lasting impact, even when placed last in the room.

Triumph was found in the hands that grasped mine as we wrestled in prayer. Love was manifested in the words that wrenched my heart and brought secret tears that they never saw. Hope was made known in the arms that held others, when pain and exhaustion were beyond words. Thankfulness was found in the feet that crossed the stage that night, but strength was found in the ones that did not.

This tournament, God gave an open door. And no matter how hard breaks, discouragement, and exhaustion tried to close that door, it remained open. I was so inspired by the ones who had eyes to see what the Spirit was doing. I was in awe of the men and women around me, who had ears to hear what the Spirit was saying. Regardless of what judges had to say about you, YOU were the champions.

You reminded me of how beautiful a heart committed to His purposes could truly be. Even when you felt like you yourself could barely stand, you picked me up and carried me, and everyone around you, with encouragement and prayer. You were strong, even in your weakest moments. You were a fighter, even when you felt defeated. We prayed for revival, in our midst. And this week, I saw it in you. Thank you for being His hands, His feet, and His heart. Thank you for letting Him fill you, to pour You out to the waiting world.

Whether your season has ended or not, you were a victor of the heart. You were triumphant, in Him. These are His words, to you.... the vessel of brotherly love:

 “To the angel of the church in Philadelphia write:

These are the words of him who is holy and true, who holds the key of David.What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open. 8 I know your deeds. See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut. I know that you have little strength, yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name. 9 I will make those who are of the synagogue of Satan, who claim to be Jews though they are not, but are liars—I will make them come and fall down at your feet and acknowledge that I have loved you. 10 Since you have kept my command to endure patiently, I will also keep you from the hour of trial that is going to come on the whole world to test the inhabitants of the earth.

11 I am coming soon. Hold on to what you have, so that no one will take your crown. 12 The one who is victorious I will make a pillar in the temple of my God. Never again will they leave it. I will write on them the name of my Godand the name of the city of my God, the new Jerusalem, which is coming down out of heaven from my God; and I will also write on them my new name. 13 Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches."

"Courage, dear heart."

~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~ 

Worship Song: 

"Desert Song",
by Hillsong United

Dear Fifth and Below

Dear Fifth and Below,

  I know you are disappointed that you didn’t break. I can imagine your face as you look through your ballots and don’t find the glowing reviews you had hoped for. Perhaps you are frustrated or a bit sad. You may even wonder if any of the effort you put into your speech was worth it. I understand your feelings because I’ve been there. I’ve wondered what the point of all this competition is if I never achieved my goals. If you don’t mind, I’d like to take a moment of your time and show you a part of competition that you may not always see. A part that I didn’t realize existed until I stopped giving the speeches and started judging them.

When I became a judge I learned that rankings can sometimes be random. That’s right, I said random.  There are three judges in a room and, although we do our best, I’m not going to say we are always correct in our assessment of your speaking. We get headaches, we get tired, and we sometimes even forget which speaker you were. If you ever become a judge you will probably do the same thing. I don’t tell you this to make you doubt every ballot you have ever received, but to point out that placing in an event really doesn’t mean as much as you may have thought it did. To a certain extend, wether or not you break is random. The impact you make is never random.

Competing is a lot of work. It takes endless hours of commitment and effort. Yet, for all the effort you put into your speeches, you probably won’t take first place. And even if you do, no one will remember that in a year or two. You will graduate, move on, and eventually even you will begin to forget which category you did the best in, or what your debate record at Nationals was. This may sound bleak, but it’s the truth. So why should you strive to perfect every speech, stay up late researching, and spend countless hours talking to a wall?

Because you are making an impact.

You probably don’t see it. You may not be impacting a crowd of thousands, or speaking to the world, but your voice spoke straight to my heart. Fifth and below, you gave me a message I desperately needed to hear. I was wondering if God even heard my cries, and you walked in with an explanation of what true love is. When I was frustrated with my failures, you came in and convicted me to always stand up for what I believe. You offered an argument so brilliantly thought out I am still in awe.  You made me laugh when I was so tired the only other option was to cry. You  made an impact and I know that for many of you high school is just the beginning. You are training right now to make an even larger impact in this world.

I walked through the halls on the last day of Nationals and saw face after face of people that had touched me, at this tournament or tournaments before. The funny thing is, most of them had no clue who I was. They didn’t realize that I could recite portions of their speech from memory or that the words they had spoken days ago were copied down in my journal. I don’t remember those people because they took first place. Right now I can’t even remember if they broke or not. I don’t remember them because of  how they did but because of what they did. I remember them because they touched me, convicted me, amused me, and blessed me beyond measure.

Are you wasting your time? If you are striving for first place, approval, or fun than yes you are. All those things will slowly pass away. But if you allow God to let you touch others, the impact you make stays long after your trophy is forgotten. For what it’s worth, this alumna doesn’t think you are wasting your time. She is grateful, convicted and blessed. And she wants you to keep going, striving for something so much more than a trophy.

Rankings can be random, but impact never is. I pray you remember that, even when you discover you are Fifth and Below.

~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~ 

Worship Song: 

"Yet Will I Sing",
by Audra Lynn

Praying Through

John Hyde was one of the most incredible Christian prayer warriors to ever walk the earth. He had dedicated his entire life to furthering the Gospel among the lost. He also knew that the only way He could ever succeed was if he was a man of prayer.

So he prayed. He would go for weeks at a time, fasting and interceding strenuously while his mission held conferences. He fought on his knees, and he saw victory in ways I can't even imagine. As his ministry progressed, God gave him the promise one year that He would use him to save one person per day. The next year, it was two. The next year, three. It continued until John Hyde had the promise from God that he would save four souls per day; and that promise was perfectly fulfilled, if not exceeded, every single time. This man was built in prayer, and the results of the faith in his life were clear.

John Hyde didn't die a normal death. He suffered from an unusual heart condition. He prayed so hard that his heart actually moved from one side of his chest to the other. When I first heard his story, my only thought was, I want to be able to pray like that.

My prayer life is so weak. I made the commitment earlier this year to intercede on my knees every day, but that doesn't mean every day is a powerful time of communion with God. My heart and my faith are so weak, and sometimes my prayers feel like they will come to nothing.

Ellerslie pastor, Eric Ludy, gave a sermon a few years ago, about the concept of "praying through"; the resolve to fight on your knees until you see an answer, and to refuse to give up until you see God come through. At first, this concept seems unsettling. What if it's not God's will to answer?  What if we're praying the wrong way?  Isn't it wrong to keep pressing in, when God hasn't answered, and may not ever answer?

At first, these seem to be legitimate concerns. But, at their core, they undermine the fundamental nature of Christ-built prayers. Jesus said in Matthew 7:7, "Ask and it shall be given to you".  We have the assurance in Christ that God hears our prayers, and desires to give to those who seek Him.  The key to answered prayer is given later on, in John 15:7, when Jesus expands on this idea: "If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, you shall ask what you will, and it shall be done until you."

If we are in Christ, and His words abide in us, it changes everything. It alters the way we view the world; it affects the way we perceive those around us; it transforms our minds and everything in our being, and conforms us to His image. Our thoughts become His thoughts; our words become His words; our prayers become His prayers. When we are in Christ, our prayers are no longer about furthering our own kingdom, but about seeing His come to earth. We aren't fighting with Him; we're fighting for Him. We're partnering with Him to see His name made known. In the words of E.M. Bounds:

"The prayers of God's saints are the capital stock in heaven by which Christ carries on His great work upon earth. The great throes and mighty convulsions on earth are the results of these prayers. Earth is changed, revolutionized, angels move on more powerful, more rapid wings, and God's policy is shaped as the prayers are more numerous, more efficient. It is true that the mightiest successes that come to God's cause are created and carried on by prayer."

If we are praying "God-prayers", we have the assurance that, in the name of Jesus, He will answer. But it may not be right away; we are called to keep pressing into Him, and persevering in prayer until we see an answer. A picture of this is seen in 1 Kings 18, when Elijah prays again for rain to return to the land. He could hear the sound of rain in heaven; He knew God was sending it, but that reality was not yet manifested on earth. So he prayed. And six different times, there was no visible answer. But Elijah was not shaken; He had faith, and continued to pray. On the seventh time, the rain came.

My faith is so weak; I know how hard it is to pray, believing. But I also know that His strength is made perfect in weakness. Even the most shallow, incompetent prayer lives can be transformed into a testimony of what God can do. My heart echoes the cry of the Roman centurion: "Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!"

He answers the cry of His people. My God has promised, and He cannot lie.

~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~ 

Worship Song: 

"Grace Like Rain",
by Todd Agnew

Holy Week: Enabled to Trust

Every time I think about the Saturday after the crucifixion, I have to wonder what the disciples were thinking. Each one of them had followed the call, to give up everything and follow their Messiah, to become fishers of men. They had left their families, dreams and careers to pursue the one they believed was the Son of God. This man was the Promised One from God; He was the Savior, who would set His people free, break every chain, rescue the oppressed, and bring triumph over their captors. And now, He was dead.

One of the hardest things about being a follower of Jesus is that we don't know the plan. Many of us are willing to follow Jesus... some even to the extent that the disciples did. We know He has a plan for us, and we have given everything to follow that plan. And suddenly, the door closes.

Gladys Aylward had given everything, to follow the calling of God to be a missionary to China. She knew this was the plan He had for her... but the door was shut. At age 27, she was dismissed from Missionary training school for failing her Bible class. But Gladys had a resolve, through the power of the cross, that nothing could could stop God's plan... not her own failures, not the world's agenda, and not even death. She chose to follow and seek Him, in spite of all the improbabilities of this plan being fulfilled. And as a result of her radical abandonment and trust, she rescued hundreds of lost Chinese souls, and became one of the greatest spiritual warriors of all time.

God may shut doors. I've seen Him do it in my own life. But I have also seen the fact that, if this is truly His plan, He will open an even more glorious passageway.

In this case?  An empty tomb.

~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~     ~ 

Worship Song: 

"I Will Follow",
by Chris Tomlin